Finding My Way to Me

In the past few weeks, I’ve been applying for new jobs that are in the education field but don’t require me to stand in front of a classroom. I have signed a contract for next year, but just barely missed the budget cuts this year (due to being one of the youngest/newest in the building). There’s no guarantee that I’ll always have this job, especially considering that more jobs will be lost next year. To be completely honest, I’m pretty sure I don’t particularly want this job much longer anyway. My heart’s not in teaching, but I can recognize that while also appreciating that this has been the best place for me for the past three years (and maybe for the next few).

As I try to figure out what my next career path is going to be (anyone want to hire an instructional designer? educational consultant? pay for law school?) , I am realizing that “teacher” has been a major part of who I am. I don’t discount that it should be a part of me, but I was making it the first thing I say when people ask about me.

“Tell me about yourself.”
“I’m a teacher…”

Not cool. So, this summer, I’ve spent some time trying to figure myself out. As shy and awkward as I was in high school and college, I was much more confident in who I am, what I stand for, what I like. During the past few months, I’ve read more books, tried new things, and I’m slowly learning about myself as an adult (not a student, not a teacher, but a person). It’s been an invaluable experience, and one that I know will allow me to be a better wife and mother when the time comes.

Last week I went on vacation with my mother to the Middle of Nowhere, South Carolina. It was a lesson in calming down, taking the time to do less and enjoy the nature that surrounds me. In that one week, I felt better and more secure about myself. I have a renewed energy to enjoy this time I have off work because there’s no telling when I’ll get another summer free. A renewed desire to focus on myself again and truly appreciate these things I’m learning about Me.

I realize that all of this may sound a bit hokey. But let me end with this: I’ve realized this year that I’m more than a teacher but haven’t found a way to focus on that. The past week has somehow, in the quiet, allowed me to see myself again. And, I’m so excited about what the future holds as I learn about myself as an adult.

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